i went to a screening of a short film the other day with my roommate. the film was very wordy and not very visually interesting, but that’s not the point of this entry.
there was free food, free wine people were all dressed up, what a good place to try to pick up! we were surveying the room analyzing women. this one's too skinny. this one's kinda trashy. quite fun actually. i have always dreamed of having a gay guy friend that i could go pick up men with. i guess this is sort of a similar situation, just a little backwards!
so we both agreed on one girl at this party. i now know that if i was a lesbian i would be very attracted to the spanish/latin girls. she was beautiful. very sweet and kind looking with a sparkle of saucy deep in her eyes. for some reason i don’t think i would have been jealous of her with "Y" even though she was very attractive. she would be perfect. but now a new problem arises and i start to get sweaty and nervous. she’s perfect, yes, but how do i pick her up!? i can flirt with a man no problem, but will the same tactics work on a woman as a man? no way! with men all you need to peak interest is a hand placed on the thigh raising the skirt a little bit, one extra button undone on the shirt and longer than normal eye contact with a slight eyebrow raise at the end. will this work on her? i know it would not work on me...i'm looking at what girls are wearing, their style, their hair. i probably wouldn’t have even noticed if a girl was looking back at me since i’m always too busy judging her!
i try some eye contact. the first time i catch her eye, she holds it for quite a while. it sends an excited tingle through my body. a few more long glances and my roommate is trying to convince me to go talk to her. how do i know she’s not looking at me wondering why this freaky girl is staring at her!? he tells me i have to get her alone. follow her to the bathroom, catch her while she’s getting wine. as if following a script we have written for her, my girl steps away from the group she is chatting with to the food table. by herself. i freeze. how do men handle this? i watch her pick up a few items and slip back into the crowd. hesitation is the lonely mans drug.
there were a few other moments where she squeezed by me and i placed a soft hand on her waist to help her by and gave a shy smile as she looked into my eyes and i looked nervously away.
when we left for the evening i gave one last look in her direction hoping that i would catch her eye again. that she would put down her drink and follow me out. that she would grab me and whisper in my ear "your search is over" and all my inhibitions would disappear with just one small kiss.
she didn’t notice me leave.